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Dog Winter

by Joseph Running Crane

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1.
Imitaa 02:50
There is a dog that follows me around town Keeps me company when friends and work can't be found He sure don't judge me for the shape that I'm in He don't don't wear a collar and he smells like the wind He defends me from weakness like no savior's done We sleep in the day and at night We run The snow falls quiet on Browning tonight While streetlights send up red-hot pillars of light But they give off no warmth like the night that you died When your only sin was just sleeping outside And I hope that you're walking in good health and shoes I hope death is to winning as living was to lose This dog with no name he eats what he finds I drink from the well and the midshelf sometimes He'll sit in front of me like he's waiting to play His ears will twitch slightly if I mention your name I know it's just thinking it's probably not true But when I talk to him it's like talking to you.
2.
Bowling Ball 03:26
Came into town went to the one place he could go To the outskirts of town to the tribal casino Dollar for dollarʼs a night on the town Breaking even, leveling out The one place where his name made no sound Oh the family that he left still living in old low rent Obligations to his father, and then back out again Home for a day or two, maybe more Takes out the trash a couple runs to the grocery store 25 years old, the horizon is clear Hopefully it takes him away from here Since every face he sees looks like a funhouse mirror All drunken and disheveled looking for a hole in government work Failure feels a little different here but it donʼt take away the hurt I am you and you are me The choices Iʼve m+de just to keep you +nd your sisters free You may stumble or you may fall But this hole in the world can roll like a bowling ball You got love and you got your friends Youʼve got the start you got the means to the ends Youʼll be back again But I donʼt know how and I sure donʼt know when Green grass in the summer Frost on the field in the fall Spring coming from the winter And here it donʼt mean that much at all
3.
Dry Engine 03:43
Told everyone you knew you were leaving but you wound up staying Tied here by promises and debts you never wound up paying And this town still speaks your name though the voice and place remain the same Whatʼll you do when you find that nothingʼs changed? You want to find a higher track An honest way to make it back Shake the dust loose from these thoughts Sort what youʼre saying from what youʼre not An honest trade for what you got Thereʼs no prettier sight than looking back on a town you left behind Van Zandt sings in your car though you donʼt have a place in mind Every wandering song that every folksinger has sung Are just words and chords if they havenʼt wandered some You want to find a straighter track An honest man when you get back Solid ground beneath the road Porch lights on when you get home An honest trade for what you own The highway moans like a prairie wind As the gale force speeds pick you up and toss you out the door again Empty pockets, gravel lots Bone-dry engine, scattered thoughts You want to sing to cleaner ears A larger bowl to hold your tears To exchange more miles for more days Things worth having you get in trade You get in trade You get in trade
4.
Found a roof overhead under the Orange Street bridge As I waited out the rain from a northern wind And the moon and the lights made the street shine so wild It turned back into the city that I knew as a child When we'd pass through on our way back to Arlee In a beat up '57 just the old man and me Now I've grown old and broken on these shining streets Where the streams of white faces don't seem to see me Count the cracks in the sidewalk as I walk to a park A piece of ground to lay on just before it gets dark But each day I wake up in the morning freeze Under the boot heels of the city police Not long ago I was a young man at war Deployed in Vietnam with the USM Corps Through shrapnel and napalm I fought without fear For the lives of the people who don't want me here My body made it back to the rez in one piece But my brain was twisted up with PTSD Like photos tacked on to the lids of my eyes Blooms of orange fire in faraway skies I never got better and the work never came My name on waiting lists at the goddamned VA But tonight these streets have been kinder to me So I'll spend a little more on that midshelf whiskey History may laugh as it recounts the days Of drunk old Indian man full of anger and shame But I walk with my dignity I walk with my pride To keep visibility 'neath the night's blooming lights
5.
We Both Know 02:51
So go on now but let me know Whether you decide to stay or to go But with some things I can't tell Whether they went too bad or too well We both know there's so little point in trying now Threw that baby and the bathwater out With so many things with so little time to figure it all out You were always gone and leaving town I don't mean to say it's all your fault That we went crashing headlong into a wall I know now it's my fault too Staying out all night drinking myself blue We both know there's so little point in trying now Threw that baby and the bathwater out With so many things with so little time to figure it all out I was always gone and leaving you out I came for your love and I stayed for your light You woke up in the morning but you shut down at night The pieces were all there but they were pieces that I couldn't repair And darling I couldn't get clear of all the smoke and mirrors We both know there's so little point in trying now Threw that baby in our dreams out With so many things with so little time to figure it all out You were always gone and leaving town We were always gone and leaving town
6.
Neon Blues 03:20
I've been cutting your drinks with water all night So you're sober enough to go home Though you came with a friend you said time and again That you're going home alone And you don't have a car and you live too far to walk in heels like that When the light comes on the wait's too long at last call to call a cab I'll give you whiskey if you ask but I'll give you coffee after that From a broken cup with these orders piling up The time slips by as the night unwinds Heard you slur your words as you walked by With those neon blues cutting through you You're getting sick again as your girlfriend's friends Take their pictures in the mirror And you can't help but ask yourself hat the hell's keeping you here Too many nights of neon lights they don't replace the moon And a late night friend still in your bed don't fix a morning before noon You know I'll spot you in a pinch I'll find your friends if you get sick I won't give a shit if you can't afford a tip I might give myself away to say I don't want to watch you hurt yourself this way To watch you fall all night and sleep all day I'll buy you a coffee if you want Take a few turns around the block No neon blues for a night or two Take my word if it still hurts I'll find another place to work And no more neon blues for me or you
7.
I'm waiting for the first snow I've locked up every window I'm waiting for the cold to take the air Searching for a new distraction Or a hold to gain some traction So when I turn I forget that you ain't there I can keep that hard cold from coming in Keep myself from making the same mistakes again I can throw the logs into the fire Set the thermostat higher But it don't stop that cold, howling wind I dreamt of you last night In a cocoon of Christmas lights Of those promises I threw into the wind Those words echoed forever Bounced off the frozen river And faded away when the summer came and went And I still feel you by my side when I sleep Fell your hands on my skin when I dream From when the winter sun goes down To when it rises from the ground Some days I wish I stayed in between And the heat of our love turns to freeze As those frozen nights turn to memory The temperature keeps falling I still keep myself from calling And I know someday you won't remember me
8.
Well Worn 03:17
Humid heat in a winter dive Desperate boys in the smoke outside Dumb and horny, heartsick and lonely Waiting for a space in line And I saw just fine in those last call lights That dress you'd wear on Saturday nights It was cold But I knew you weren't going home alone Loneliness on Cuban heels Fresh heartbreak with a worn in feel I feel so bad But you look so good Too tired to carry this momentum through Can't lift my head to lick these wounds Drunk and sorry, threadbare and hungry Space between a hawk and the moon Silhouettes blurred in random position Prayers slurred out to anyone who will listen I'll pray That she don't see me this way Tailor-made for threadbare hearts Hand-stitched seams that fray and come apart You look good in red But I'm feeling blue Now my head feels lighter than it's ever been It's so easy now to be carried around by the wind And I rose high above the mountainside Til the wind blew me back to the high line But I felt so good on the ground when you were mine I can't hold you like I used to do I'm a cold-weather coat that you outgrew Don't get me wrong We looked good together But I don't mind waiting for someone who fits me better
9.
10.
They say the words spill from your guts when your heart's on the floor And melodies appear when birds don't sing anymore But there are no words inside this heart no song in my ears So the only thing upon the page is the blooming of my tears So darling know I've cried all I can cry over you Forgive me if I can't sing a song about you too To find the chords to ease the pain of all these memories But I'd be a singin' man if you'd forgive a fool like me Back in the days I had your love the songs came with ease As natural as water flows or sunlight through trees But as water can't flow backwards light can't retreat to the sun And what I've said can't be unsaid and I've done can't be undone So darling know I've cried all I can cry over you Forgive me if I can't sing a song about you too To find the chords to ease the pain of all these memories But I'd be a singin' man if you'd forgive a fool like me

credits

released September 12, 2019

Recorded, engineered and mixed by Aaron Jennings at Listening Hat HQ (Missoula, MT)
Mastered by Blake Bickel at Dynamic Sound Service Mastering (Kalamazoo, MI)
All songs written by Joseph Running Crane except
When The Fire Goes Out written by J Daniel Kane
And
True Love Will Will Find You In The End written by Daniel Johnston
Cover art and layout by David Lewis Johnson

Joseph Running Crane - Guitars and vocals
John West - Upright bass
Michael Bustamante - Drums and percussion
Aaron Jennings - Pedal Steel and dobro

Many thanks to:
Aaron Jennings and the Jennings-Ludwick family
John West and Booster Bustamante
Dave Johnson
Jamie Ford
Aaron Parrett
Shawna Lee
Drew Landry
Robert Hall
J Daniel Kane
Mom, Dad, Lindy and Mike, Darin, Haley and Dylan Kaylin, River, Juniper and Milo

And To Those That Walk On Four Beside Us:
Chomsky (RIP)
Elliot
Izzy
Socks

This recording was made largely possible through the First Peoples Fundʼs Artists In Business Leadership Fellowship.
Thank you for your belief in me.

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Dog Country

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